Mississippi Moments

Friday, April 16, 2010

Perspective...all in the perspective.
I am chuckling. I am cozy. Porter is chewing. Barbra is singing in the other room. Just finished dinner and am on to my second cup of wine in a teacup. It is Friday. This is all a good thing.

I find my 'Self" and my thoughts standing in front of the very famous painting called the "Birth of Venus". Which I did in ordinary reality at the Uffizi Palace in Firenze. Not because this is a world famous painting but because of the impact and meaning of this piece of visual expression. I won't go off on all of that here only to say that while that was being painted, people were still throwing their refuse, porto-potty collections, dead animals, dead people into the streets. Imagine the smell, rot, crap piled up. Then change rooms, change focus, change jobs--and see/feel/experience something entirely different--succulent, full of depth, color, transition, creation, order, sensuality, borderline pornographic for the day. Not so different today.
I don't throw my junk into the street (unless you count this blog), but when I went to Italia, I was sure fussing over things related to this house and this life. The little tilt, the lack of space, the lack of organization, the lack of quality in the work outside (which has all but been fixed--I am in process of redoing and correcting the errors made with the bamboo barrier, but one thing at a time.The fence is now complete and done correctly and made to last with love and focus. I need to get out there tomorrow and "clear" the area and reconnect to the balance in the wards. We have a new one that has just shown up to replace the archangelica--Holly!! I digress...)
Perspective. Then I stayed in some pretty fine hotels that I would never have been able to afford if it hadn't been for this tour (Go Rick Steves ETBD!) and they ALL tilted. They were all from the 12th or 13th century except one. The newest one was a former Benedictine nunnery from the 15th century (1402-1501)! And it tilted! I can live with tilt. I also can live with the lovely indoor plumbing that I have and the sweet little garden. The people of Rome and Florence that don't have bizillions to live on have these sweet terrace gardens chock-full of herbs, scented flowers like jasmine and geranium and stone, stone, stone. For them, the stones are family. I can relate to that. Perspective.
I, who am scared to death of nearing the edge of some backyard decks like the McLeans or the overpass at Carkeek Park to get to the beach...I hiked the cliff trails of Cinque Terre...and without drugs!! At a couple of places, I will admit, I was having a name-down with one of the other tour members who was also scared of heights and she was from a family of 11. So we were walking along these scary parts and calling out the birth order of our families as quickly as we could without laughing! And all the people hiking around us were just cracking up...and then they would call out "Do it again"...and after a bit, several of them were trying to do it with us. They kept giving us another girl named Kitty between Colleen and Brigie. Maybe in another life, eh? Perspective.
I can hike cliffs if I want/need to. I can get stuck (literally) over and over if need be to be well in all aspects of my life when I use to pass out at needles. I can relish stinky dogs and hair up my nose and all manner of things, because no damn volcano got in the way of my bucket list. I can choose wine or tea or water...or single malt. I can choose to trust again and love...which I have. Perspective.
I can quit my job and wonder what the heck am I going to do or be....and for now, it's all in the perspective, in the soft rain, with baby squirrel chuckles and Porter at the window barking at Fletcher coming up the walk for a cup of tea.


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