Mississippi Moments

Saturday, February 28, 2009

I may change my mind...again. Ok, I just did.
I am mad and hurt about something that happened this week.

I am actually blogging from Thousand Oaks, CA. I am going exploring and learning --LaBrea Tar Pits, the Getty Museum, the Huntingdon Library and Gardens, the Pacific Coast Highway, some hiking, some downtime. It is warm down here.

So, I'll say it again. Parents are the first and most important teachers of their children. There are many tools out there for a parent to grow skills to help their own child to be balanced, healthy, happy, and whole. (Same for themselves). I do not "Give advice". I make recommendations for adding tools and strengthening what is already in the tool box (like Love and Logic). I speak honestly. I know my stuff. I have much more to learn about all this. And next time, I share my expertise, I better be getting paid for it like I do everywhere else---except Jonestown which is where I go to share and give back because so much has been given to me. Talk about Damage. And the HUGE healing Power and Grace of Christ.

I am glad it is Lent. For once. Usually, I dread Lent.
It is an invitation to sigh. To stop. To quit trying. To be.
My massage therapist was talking with me last week about something that is on my plate...the past week at Cancer Care Alliance really threw me off my game. Really did. And, no, I still don't have the results of the MRI. I really don't care. I am living my life. I was sharing about how I got knocked off my pedestal of Peace. Hard. And she laughed and said she spends most times just trying to find hers and climbing back on. I don't know all of her story but she is a three-time cancer survivor and has been through really tough times and back and around...she shared about how she still gets hooked and goes immediately into what she calls "Warrior"....instead of stepping into "Wisdom" or "Wise Woman". That resonates so with me. So, I've made some healthy decisions for me. I will not even try to get back on the pedestal. I'm going to sit with my back to it and my butt situated on the ground. I am going to love. I am going to stay in the present. I am going to continue failing and then being successful at going from "Warrior" to Wise Woman" when these sort of things happen. I am going to complete the section B on the Parenting Plan for the third time for the adoption process. I wish it was required for any and all parents to complete the Parenting Resource Plan multiple times like it has been for me---it would get people talking, sharing, connecting......I am going to continue to love and to live my life from a place of love, not fear, anger, and frustration. It's not worth it. Bring it on.
And Cedar is happy and "making cookies" (actually he and Dave sit in front of the stove watching and waiting for the magic thing to spit out the goodies!)Bless that Lydia! And bless that I have a job that allows this all to happen.

5 Comments:

  • At 9:44 AM, Blogger The Freewaydiva said…

    Wait...there's a pedestal? I had no idea. Hard to balance on those things and you, sure as shit, can't dance on one...

    Love you!

     
  • At 1:45 PM, Blogger Colleen said…

    you know what? your mind change timing was perfect. i am really glad to have just read your words, FGM.

    "to quit trying, to just be"

    to get very quiet.

    have a wonderful time! love you.

     
  • At 3:35 PM, Blogger Michele said…

    that's my girl...
    Love,
    Auntie Michele

     
  • At 6:34 PM, Blogger MihErn said…

    I love y'all back...and the Mission at San Buenaventura was very cool today...and sacred. It is soo warm here....and FD, you CAN dance next to one...you just need a margarita!

     
  • At 7:43 PM, Blogger The Freewaydiva said…

    NEXT to one, yes; ON one, not so much. And Margaritas are always a good idea. Hee!

     

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